Pain is all mine

Open the door and usher in some light
watch the dismal darkness fade away
question your sorrow, your beliefs
ponder what was good, forget the bad
bury the visions that haunt you
they are but ghosts of time gone by
no one to speak to, nothign to speak about
all that ails me is in my head
a smoke filled room, where I cannot breath
a lost love that I can't feel
blind to plight of people around me
I walk like the ghost of my dreams
obsessed with self and all that i desire
time heals all and time is my recluse
but till that happens, pain is all mine

Nightmares

Dreams, they strike again
or should i call them nightmares
themes beyond comprehension
days spent deliberating the subconscious
relationships of hate and betrayal
and yet they hurt so much
as the days go by
and the dust starts to settle
there is just devastation to be seen
as far as one could see

Winter is setting in

did you see the leaves fall
the clutter on the roads
all the shades of brown and yellow

the winter would be long this year

I don't dread the cold
nor do I fear the depressing mornings
brooding afternoons are welcome
as are restless evenings
but there is no spring in offing
no promise of summer as far as i can see

the winter would be long this time around

the chill is setting in my bones
my heart has gone all but cold
some times there is a flutter at the core
but thaw is no more in sight
the clots are beginning to form
the hurt oozes out of wounds still
each passing day is endearing
each morbid thought welcome
the hush after the rush
the summer that lasted a bit too long

the winter promises to last a long time too

Weekend getaway

Diwali - Festival of Lights

Marlboro Lights


555 Lights


B&H Lights

Racing along

I have been thinking about this one incident for quite some time now. am not able to get it out of my mind. I don't know how I came to remember it, It just flashed in my mind as I was driving down to office after a whole week of being sick.
I would have been in 4th or 5th standard, so that means i would have been 8 or 9 year old. School was having the annual sports day, and this was the first time we were taken out from school premises to a big ground somewhere near the school. I remember being excited, because I had my birthday approaching.
anyway, it was 100m or maybe 50m race that I lined up to participate in. I had a friend, Manish Kr Sinkoo, standing next to me. I started running along with other kids, and soon everyone started getting ahead of me, i ran as hard as I could, but it was no good, I was not good enough. I called Manish to wait, he wouldn't listen and when i felt him getting away too, I held him. I held his arm and tried to stop him, he yelled out to some teacher for help, and yanked his arm away from me.
I had tears in my eyes, no breath in my lungs, legs giving way under me.
I think Abhishek Rawat won the race, Manish Kr Sinkoo lost out because of me. I don't remember if I completed the race.