The dilemma

I don't understand a lot of things that happen to me, maybe I am not
seeing the omens hidden in them. At this juncture it has become more
difficult than ever to think positively and clearly. I feel pulled
into negative thoughts, feel like crying and yelling and somehow
venting out my feelings.
I don't know why things have gone so bad.

I don't feel like continuing any more, everything seems like a burden
and I am the beast of the burden, supposed to carry it all with poise
and dignity, I never asked for it, but I have to still bear it. And
they say I am the one to blame for everything that went wrong. I think
expectation are really getting on to me. I don't want to have any
expectation and I don't want people to expect things from me.

Hope I feel better soon ,cause this has to end, better sooner than later

--
I am one hell of a guy, I can do anything I want, only I just don't have the
faintest idea what.

- Zaphod Beeblebrox, in The Hitch Hiker's Guide To The Galaxy