Who am I to ask

Oh the fine feeling of despair
hits in again and makes me take note
of all that is lost and all that will be
nothing static yet all in circles
what has come to pass will happen again
and again and again and again
hard to let go tougher to fight
oblivion is not so easy any more
paradise in waiting
and I float on clouds
oh wait, is it that hangover again
hangover of a high
a low that creeps up unawares
and draws the last ounce of your soul
no soul, no hope, no deliverance
just a sadness beyond comprehension
sit and stare at walls
or star outside the window all you want
this will not pass
and if it does, it will come back again
in circles
more like spiral
each subsequent one drawing you deeper in misery

How long can a man be lost
who am I to ask…...